POUR SOME BLEACH INTO MY EYES, NOW!

Do I even need to explain anymore that covering some mediocre piece of hardware with Swarovsky (it’s always Swarovsky) crystals does not immediately transform it into something good?

Oh, why do I even try?  They’re just going to keep making this shit, no matter what I (or anyone else) says.  I should just put a bullet into my skull and hope that I get buried in a Swarovsky crystal-covered casket.  Hey, maybe I can find Swarovsky crystal-encrusted bullets!  Very ironic way to go, wouldn’t you say?

Crystal-Encrusted Toaster –  Neiman Marcus

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