The Hardcore Moralist Without Morals
by The Cranky Media Guy
I was feeling a little homesick for New York a
few minutes ago, so I went to a website that has several cameras in
Times Square. As it was 4:30 in the morning, there weren't
very many people on the street. God knows I didn't see any
hookers; thanks to Sheriff Rudy, they've all been driven into the
Hudson River, like St. Patrick did with the snakes in Ireland.
Funny thing about Republicans like Giuliani and
Newt Gingrich--they seem to take the Ten Commandments very
literally. When it says, "Thou shalt not commit
adultery," they figure it means thou and not them.
For people who feign moral outrage when others cheat, they don't
seem to have a big problem doing it themselves.
Yup, Mr. Tough On Crime Mayor has gotten caught
with his pants down (and that's not a pretty thing to contemplate).
It was hardly a secret in Gotham that Mr. and Mrs. Giuliani lead
separate lives, but he could have had the class to be at least a little
bit discreet about his affairs. He didn't have to march
in parades with his concubine next to him, thereby rubbing his
infidelity in his wife's face, did he?
His total lack of discretion is what makes his
outburst at reporters asking him about his failing marriage the
other day so amusingly hypocritical. You can't surprise your
wife by announcing to the world at a press conference that you're
going to seek a legal separation and then turn around and act upset
because the newspapers are interested in your private life.
It's a little late in the game to get touchy, Rudy. The good
ship Moral Indignation sailed and you weren't onboard, Buddy.
The Big Question now is whether or not Rudy
will stay in the Senate race. Some people, including me, think
he'll use his prostate cancer as the excuse to bail. He's
still playing it cutesy, though. Just this past Monday, he
called a press conference to announce that he hasn't decided what to
do yet. Yup, he made the reporters come to City Hall just so
he could tell them he had nothing to say. Kind of odd for a
guy who just wants the press to leave him alone, wouldn't you say?
Ah, but that's how weasels operate. "Do as I say, not as
I do" is the Weasel Creed. And Rudy, my boy, you
are the Weasel of the Week.